I am thankful this week....

It hit me last night how lucky I am. I know in my last couple of post I have only been talking about my chaotic life and not how thankful I am for everything I have. You know the other night before I went to the ER my brother Taylor gave me a blessing of comfort before I left. He said something about my trials and how Heavenly Father is aware of them and that they are there for a reason to make me stronger.

All my life I have heard your trials are there to make you stronger and prepare you for things to come. I truly believe that. I know the trials I had as a teenager made it possible for me to deal with my divorce and raising kids by myself. And trust me my little family has had our share of trials whether health, financial whatever. And we talk about those my kids know that those have made us stronger as a family and as individuals. I know they have made my boys into better men to watch what it takes to hold a family together and my daughter more aware of what you need to choose as a mate. But sometimes you just want to have a pity party about the whole thing and say why me? But you know lately I haven't felt that way. I know without a doubt that these are our trials and that Heavenly father is truly watching over us. That the struggles we went through for me to get through school and become a nurse we are now reaping the blessings of. We have a beautiful house,for the most part my kids are healthy, I have been blessed with a truly amazing group of kids. I can't even begin to tell you how great they are. They all have their moments but we all do. They let me sleep Friday afternoon and finished cleaning up for company. They haven't let me move much since I got home. They have gotten on to me if I pick up a broom etc. Sorry my pet peave is the floor. I can't stand it.

I just realized how I was just complaining instead of telling how thankful I was to have my kids, siblings , mom, dad & kim, everyone that has helped me out. The Bishop even called to check on me Friday and little did he know I was in the ER. He was ready to jump up and be there right that second. I told him it was ok and that I was finishing up I hope I didn't hurt his feelings. I have been very blessed in my life. I don't know if I tell people enough how wonderful my life is.

I get the feeling from people that they feel sorry for me. I don't know if it is from not being married and having to do it myself or what. But the honest truth is Our lives are so much better now than when I was married. When your in an abusive relationship being married isn't good. You don't get or see the blessings like you would in a good marriage. So to be a single mom of 5 great kids where life isn't hell is much better. We struggle but I will tell you what the struggles are always followed by blessings. I just have to remember to look and list them. My boys(Malcolm and Cole) often talk about the men they will be. Their lives have been difficult especially Malcolm's he's had to grow up way to fast but he is learning to look at the blessings he has received in life.

Ok back to the point of this. I have been so blessed. Even with the week turning out nothing like I thought it would be. I know that the Lord has a bigger picture in mind when we hit these speed bumps. I have learned to trust him and wait for the blessings and deal with our trials knowing he is there the whole way through.

So this year I am very thankful for my kids, family (craziness and all) and all the speed bumps the lord wants to give me.