I tried to find a recent picture of Malcolm to put on here. Hmmm band band band.I wonder why..He has been all about that. We went for Malcolm's preop appointment today. On the way there he was talking about how nervous he was getting. We were at Cooks for a couple of hours. After talking to everyone we needed to talk to we left. During our visit they talked about how when they put him under they will tube him and will paralyze him while they do the surgery. They also told him that while they usually put you way under they can't with him. If they do it interfers with the firing of the heart which they need to deal with during surgery. So he very well may remember things that happen during surgery.
This was one of his big concerns.
On the ride home he announces that he is at peace.He said it just that way. He has been so sweet the last few days. Not that he isn't normally but more so. Last night I was so tired that I was watching tv with Eve, Alex and Sebastian in my room and I fell asleep. They all got up to leave and I looked at the clock it was only 6:50pm. Wow. But I just couldn't stay awake. Malcolm came in telling me he would finish the laundry and wake Eve in the morning. How sweet... He fell asleep before it was done and Mom called me she thankfully put the clothes in the dryer so I didn't have to drag my tired but downstairs. Then this morning I woke up Eve. He felt so bad. Really it wasn't a big deal. By the time I got up I had slept almost 12 hours. I never get to sleep that long.
I took kids to school and headed to see a couple of patients. When I came home the house smelt soooo good. He was cooking french toast, eggs and bacon for me. It tasted really good.
We went to Adam's house for blessings. I think it was a big relief for me. I always have enjoyed having my brother close by to give blessings to me and my kids. I have brother in laws that help out in this too. But there is something about Adam's blessings. I can't put my finger on it. Maybe at times he understands things better than I realize. But he talked about the angels that we have around us and how they help us in our daily lives. Well lets just say it is exactly what I needed to hear. Malcolm too. As we were leaving Avery started crying. Her Evie was leaving. Ahh. Eve just loves spending time with her. It is like the little sister she never had. I guess Avery did too.
Crazy part about our visit to the hospital.... The nurses and Doctors had bets on when he would be in the hospital. Many of who just knew he would be in early this week due to the constant problems he had on his medicine. I can testify that the only thing keeping him from the hospital was the hand of God. Everyone says god doesn't give you more than you can handle. Boy did he know me this week or what I just could not have handled splitting my time between work,kids, Malcolm and financial stresses. Thank heavens for answered prayers.
Side note.... since I use this as my journal... I am royally irritated with my ex. He went into a job his current job and decided he would be straight commission. Hmmm how well does that work with the economy. And no offense he isn't the best salesman. ok that wasn't nice. But really. I find this out how? When I check my balance with the child support office... hmm a whole whopping $24. Yes that will what fill my gas tank. lets just say that doesn't come close to what it is suppose to be. So that sent me scrambling and of course that means from here on out I need to not depend on my child support. Which means I had to call the hospital and pick up more shifts. So between Sunday night and Saturday night I will be working (scheduled that is ) 32 hours on top of my fulltime job. YUCK!!!! Which will likely turn into about 40+ hours by the time it is said and done.
Let me check my self> I am very grateful for my jobs I do have. I know there are a lot of people who don't have jobs let alone 2. So that I am thankful for. I just wish especially at this time of year with my already chaotic life I didn't have to make it more so.
Well, I am not as nervous as I had been about Malcolm's surgery. I think I am just a little scatter brain if you couldn't tell by this post. I cleaned most of my house today swept and mopped and vacuumed. Never got to the bathrooms but at least part of it is done. I actually pretty tired tonight and hopefully I will sleep good so I won't be going crazy from lack of sleep. Malcolm I think will sleep pretty good tonight. He seems pretty positive. That is one thing he has been able to learn through all his trials is the cup is always half full not empty. He even said something to that effect to the nurse today. I am so proud of him and the young man he is becoming. God has truly blessed me with him.
Oh I as soon as this is over I have got to get Alex into the doctor. He has complained of aches. But down to the bones. I remember having growing pains in my legs especially. But this just seems like more. In my prayers he goes and hopefully he will be able to sleep tonight too.
Thanks for all the prayers guys. I appreciate it. I will post tomorrow on how things go.
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